My Church

I currently do not have a home church. I have been attending the same church for about 6-7 years now. One of the first things I've learned about a church, is that it's not a building. A church is the group of people who meet there. The followers of Christ who all come together to worship and praise the Lord. That's what a church is.

I have wanted to belong to that church for a few years now, but it seems I always allow something to get in the way. I don't like that I allow that to happen. I'm sure Satan does though. He knows exactly what buttons to push to get me to question whether or not i'm in the right place.

I have been praying about it, and when I do, I awake to feeling renewed, determined, that i'm right where he wants me to be, and I feel as though there are changes I'm supposed to be helping occur at this church. But then, I look at the opposition i'm facing and I decide that it's not my place. Who am I to just join a church and request changes! That's asinine!  Wouldn't it make sense to feel the spiritual needs that my family has, and seek out a church that can accommodate them? However, our spiritual needs change constantly! We can't just go jumping from church to church depending on what mood we're in!!!

Many family and friends know how many churches I have frequented. This is the only church where I really feel his presence. Where I can leave there feeling closer to Jesus, longing to spend time with Him. It's a great high.

I recently wrote about not wanting to be a seat warmer. Wanting to get up and take action and do more. Well, sadly, I haven't done anything in that aspect. In fact, I've been pushed back down the couple of times that I have tried. I'm still determined to get right back up though.

I have friends and family that pray daily. Please keep me in prayer that no matter how many times Satan trips me up, I will continue to get up and get closer to Jesus.

Blessing Bags

Have you heard of these yet?

I just came across the idea on Pinterest. You fill a ziplock bag with things that would help out a homeless individual that you come across. Many people prefer not to give them money, but it's obvious that they have some sort of need.

I've seen lots of different ideas of what to put in these bags. Such as toothbrush and toothpaste, soap, small snacks, coins, some people even put in socks or Tylenol.

I love this idea! I don't have enough money to make a bunch of  bags, probably not even ten at the moment, but I have enough to make a couple, maybe even three. They won't all contain the same stuff either. I know that given the opportunity, and saying a blessing over each bag that I create, God will see to it that it goes to where or whomever it needs to. That's the wonderful thing about trusting God. I can pray that these bags make to where He desires, and He will see to it that it does. I won't have to do the dirty work of following the bags to see where they end up.

This evening I will begin making my bags. Before doing so, I will pray. I will pray that God already knows who will be receiving a blessing bag. I will pray that He shows me what needs to belong in each bag. When I sit to write some words of encouragement for each bag, I pray that He will give me the words to write. He will then control who I come in contact with that will make good use of the blessing bag.

Pray about this. If it's something that feels right for you to do, I encourage you to give it a try. One bag at a time.

Thank Heaven My Soul Doesn't Wear Pants!!

I will begin with the scripture I read this morning:

From the Message: 

Ephesians 5:15-20

So watch your step. Use your head. Make the most of every chance you get. These are desperate times!

Don't live carelessly, unthinkingly. Make sure you understand what the Master wants. 

Don't drink too much wine. That cheapens your life. Drink the Spirit of God, huge draughts of him. Sing hymns instead of drinking songs! Sing songs from your heart to Christ. Sing praises over everything, any excuse for a song to God the Father in the name of our Master, Jesus Christ. 

From KJV:

See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise,

Redeeming the time, because the days are evil.

Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is.

And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit;

Speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord;

Giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ;

There were three parts in this passage that spoke the loudest to me, i'll get to all of them as the day lets me. The one i'm feeling compelled to share with you today is:

Drink the Spirit of God, huge draughts of Him.

If you read KJV, it's 'And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit.'

I looked up the word draught, it means a large and hurried swallow. So, we are not told to sip at the Spirit of God, we're to take HUGE FAST GULPS!! (this will bring on a whole new blog all in itself, but for now, lets stay focused)

I'm an over-eater. Don't worry, it's not a secret, my pant size may be hidden, but my assets are not. Can you blame me?! There's some pretty tasty food out there! There's Italian cuisine, comfort food, southern food, can't forget tacos! The good Lord knows I love me some tacos! So, yes, as I enjoy these wonderful delights, my soul is not fairing too well. I'm supposed to be drinking the Spirit of God....huge draughts of Him!! Yeah, from what I've noticed, that's not really on my daily menu.....yet! I intend to add it in starting today.

I was asked what drinking the Spirit of God would look like. My mind immediately went to what would it TASTE like. I imagine that it would come in a spiffy can or bottle. One with an awesome logo and catchy slogan. It would taste heavenly! Better than ice cream! Better than tacos! Better than tacos topped with ice cream! (that was for my prego friends) Not only would it taste amazing, it would be healthy! It would contain all the nutrients your soul needs! It would taste so good, that you wouldn't just stop at one serving. You would drink it non-stop! Stores would be out of stock! Distribution companies would not be able to delivery it fast enough! People would buy it by the cases, better yet, the truck load!

Think of something unhealthy, that you consume throughout the day. Mine is soda. I could drink 5 cans if I let myself! And it doesn't even taste that good! Now, imagine if that soda was replaced by the Spirit of God.

If I spent as much time feeding my soul as I feed my body, my soul would need elastic pants!

I often hear that people wish to pray more, to have a closer relationship with Jesus, and I'm one of those people. For today, every time I drink my water or soda, i'm going to pause and picture myself being filled with the liquid Spirit of God. Try it! 

All Good Things Come From God

What a blessing it is to see so many of my family and friends showing thanksgiving through social media sites like Facebook and Twitter! I love it!

In a world where there isn't much time dedicated to giving thanks for the things we have, I can always count on November to roll around and see how cheerful people can be when they stop for a moment and give thanks. It doesn't matter whether they are Christians or not, they are still thankful. In that small moment of time, we get to see how each other are blessed in different ways. Of course it creates the beautiful opportunity to witness to people when their hearts are joyous for the blessings they have noticed in their lives.

I am one of the best examples of not giving thanks the way I ought to. I am dedicating the next 365 days to the term Eucharisteo. I love saying it, kinda rolls off my tongue after a while. I want to learn to give thanks in all situations, all blessings, all encounters, everything! It's going to take practice. This is where the book Unglued will come in handy as I try to stay focused on all the good things. It's easy for me to get distracted. Now that I think about it, I may need a book about restraint, foot-in-mouth disease, and self control ;) it may be a long year.

When I looked up Eucharisteo, I found that it didn't just mean giving thanks. It also meant with grace and joy. I give thanks a lot of times, but sadly the grace and joy isn't there. It's a 3-parter, can't have one part without the other to live this word for the next year. I have a need, a desire, a calling to embrace a Eucharisteo filled life. I will try my hardest to live according to His Word to accomplish the full spectrum of Eucharisteo...once again, its so much fun to say!! I should start a list of words that rhyme with Eucharisteo, I might be able to come up with a catchy tune!

I was told that the word 'thanks' or 'thanksgiving' appears about 40 times in the bible. I'm excited to have a few moments to find them. It'll be a like a little scavenger hunt!

I'm also following Ann Voskamps 1000 Gifts Joy Dare. She posts a monthly list of topics to inspire you to write 3 things you are thankful for daily. I just started it, and already enjoy it.

I am also challenging YOU to keep posting what you are thankful for well after Thanksgiving. When you are faced with a tough situation, you will have more strength going into that battle if you remember all that you have been blessed with throughout the year. Let's call it a Eucharisteo Bank. Make sure it stays full, and you are always adding to it, that way, when Satan is trying to bring you down, and situations seem unbearable, you can draw from your Eucharisteo Bank, draw closer to God and trust Him to carry you through.

In search of myself

and so the investigation continues. I am searching for a female, approximately 5'4, although some will argue i'm off by about 2", no matter for the weight, just a hefty load of beauty and brains, not sure of the age, but born in '79. Last seen @ 6yrs ago, finishing college, full time job, desire to work with children, many friends, reaching goals, a light in a dark tunnel for almost everyone. She has some questions to answer in regards to her whereabouts the past few years. Wanted, dead or alive, preferably alive so her smile can rekindle emotions, feelings, and desires once again.

Romney ~ the easy road

I went to bed frustrated at the election results. Do you know how much easier it would have been to stop abortion, make people work for what they have, and be accountable for their actions if Romney would have been elected? The burden would no longer be on us as individuals because we would have passed the buck to someone else, someone higher up, someone with the power to just sign a bill and make it all go away. Unfortunately, that obviously was not in God's will. As I went to bed last night, I prayed, like i'm sure many other Christians did. I prayed, and asked God to show me what I can do, since my first plan of taking the easy road flopped. I prayed for our president, that his heart would soften, that he would not be dictated by other countries. (I woke up to hearing about other countries cheering that Obama won, I would too if I was getting away with everything they were)

Looking at abortion, is it possible that if Romney was elected and put a stop to people murdering their babies, that they would never realize that it is a life? Would they miss out on the possibility of hearing God's Living Word? Since it would be illegal, there would be no reason for Christians to reach out to them, there would be no opportunity to get them to make their own choice. Maybe we're meant to join the battle and get out on the front lines and stand firm. Teach the unknown what exactly is going on and the choice they are making. I keep hearing "you wouldn't get mad at a blind man for stepping on your toe" and neither should we get angry and frustrated for a non-believer who just doesn't know or see the truth. It's our job as Christians to lead the way. We need to educate. We need to guide. We need to first get up from our computers and cozy homes and reach out to those who think a pregnancy is nothing more than a blob of cells.

I can't stand when people say Romney was going to take away womens rights. It should never be someone's RIGHT to kill another human being! They say they should be able to do whatever they want to their body, I agree, however, they shouldn't be allowed to harm that baby's body.

I'm concerned for my friends who serve in the military.

I think there's something wrong when other countries are this excited that a president has been re-elected. I think he's way too soft on China. I think our economy is going to go further into the ground. I really hope i'm wrong on this.

On to same sex marriage. I used to have the thought of "what happens behind closed doors is none of my business." If they wanted to marry someone of the same sex, sure why not! but I don't understand the theory that it's unconstitutional for same sex couples to be denied marriage. It's not even a privilege defined in the Constitution, so therefore it cannot be unconstitutional to deny it. I am for the traditional definition of marriage, as it states in the Bible, but the most I can do is equip others with the information that it contains and let them make their own decision.

It's a tough place to be a Christian. Voting for Romney, I was called so many names. I was told that I was judging others, that I was forcing my religion on everyone else, that I was not willing to compromise, that I was racist, and that I wanted to set our country back 100 years. I am none of those things. Just as others have their beliefs, and their choices that they want to make, I have mine too. I did not vote for Romney to judge others, I voted for him so the 3,000 babies who are killed daily may have a chance to not be judged before birth. I did not vote for Romney to force my beliefs on anyone, I voted for him so I can stay true to my own beliefs. I did not vote for Romney because I am racist, many friends, family and co-workers can attest to that. I also did not want to set our country back, I want to hold true to MY values. That's something I should be allowed to do without getting repercussions. We live in a world where people do not share the same beliefs or opinions. That's okay. It doesn't mean that I need to sway with the majority, or that the minority needs to sway my way. It means that we are all different. It means that in this melting pot of a world,  we should not need to conform to one groups ways, theories, lifestyles, etc. or be accused of bullying or being unaccepting. Wouldn't that make people who disagree with me judgemental and unaccepting? Just a thought.

Okay, my rant here is over. Now to take the first step now that the election is over. It's time to pray for our president. It's time to pray that everything goes according to God's will. It's time to stop trying to pass the buck to someone else and stand up for what we believe in. It's time to take action. Go volunteer somewhere. If you are in a woman's group, be a proactive woman's group, not a reactive woman's group. If you are feeling led to start a group in your area for whatever belief or right you wish to hold up, don't just sit on the sidelines, get up and get started. The next person I hear or see complaining about the election results, I will ask them, so are you just going to sit there defeated or are you going to make a difference in your own community? We have to start somewhere, and starting at the top didn't work out so well. I'd love to hear what you as an individual or as a group are doing/going to do from here.

Thankful day 2

Ok, so I'm off to a late start but I've noticed on fb and fellow bloggers pages that people are posting something they are thankful for every day this month.

When I think of things that I am thankful for, the first thing that comes to my mind is our sewage system n toilets. I'm very grateful they are in proper worker order. Aren't you?

Lost in a picture

Looking back at pictures from when I was younger I can see where I was at that time in my life and see how far I've come, how much I've grown and changed.

I know I'm not finished maturing. I know that God is still chiseling away at my heart, teaching me to be more humble, more loving, more Christ-like.

Even from a month ago, I've changed. With Gods gentle hand He has shown me what I'm doing right, and what I'm doing wrong.

I recently had a time of fellowship with a ladies group. I loved it! We were a group of women who put all our cards on the table. No one was fake. No one pretended to have it all figured out. We were real women, with real stress, who are all constantly growing closer to Jesus. Sharing with each other and being encouraging, not judgmental.  No one seemed afraid to show or tell others that they are not perfect or that they may have a situation that they are trying to work through as biblically as possible. The best way I get encouraged is by seeing others grow as a Christian. Ending our time together with ice cream was an added benefit.

I'm doing some self reflection, can't wait to share with everyone how I've changed and what I'm doing to enjoy life a little more in hopes it will encourage others!

Pray for your husband

I've heard it a lot lately, pray for your husband.

I don't do it nearly as much as I should. I'll be honest, sometimes I get so wrapped up in my children, the prayer requests from church and friends and family that my husbands prayer needs usually fall by the waist side. I'll add him into my prayers if he has a specific request, or for his general health and well being. As his wife and with him as the head of our household I do not pray for him nearly as much as I should.

He has a big role in my life. He provides for us, he cares for us, he leads us, his job of taking on all this responsibility can be stressful. He needs to not only be aware of the path that God is asking him to walk and guide his family on, but he must also be on the lookout for satan's tricks. Without proper prayer, he may not be as strong as he needs to be.

I recently joined an online bible study group Be The Proverbs 31 Woman, it's on facebook if you're interested. We'd love to have you join us! I'm loving this group already and I  think i'm only a couple weeks in! A couple women on here shared ways to pray for your husband. I love them!

The first one is a set a note cards that you can print off the internet and turn into a little ring set for easy flip through. It has 31 ways to pray for your husband and also has a bible verse to go along with each one.

Here is the link to the blog where this can be found. I think its a great resource. As I was copying them down for a friend, I was glancing through and realized that my quick little prayers for Pete could be so much more effective with these cards as a guide. I hope you enjoy them and get as much out of them as I did.

prayer cards for our husbands

Another link that was provided in this group was a way to pray for your husband from head to toe. What a neat idea! I never thought of that before, but it makes sense. I need every part of my husband being a doer of the word, so doesn't it make sense to pray for every part of him? I think it does! I can't find the link I was looking for, so i'll just copy and paste:

Let’s Pray:
Dear Lord, I pray for my husband, from head to toe.

• His Head -That he will look to You as Lord of his life. (1 Corinthians 11:13)
• His Mind ­­- That he will have the mind of Christ and think as the Holy Spirit would lead him and not the flesh. (1 Corinthians 2:16)
• His Eyes -That You will keep his eyes from temptation and that he will turn his eyes from sin. (Matthew 6:13, Mark 9:47)
• His Ears – That he will hear Your still small voice instructing him. (1 Kings 19:12, Psalm 32:8)
• His Mouth – That his words will be pleasing to You. (Proverbs 19:14)
• His Neck -That he will humble himself before You and be strong, courageous, and careful to do everything written in Your Word so that he will be prosperous and successful. (James 4:10, Joshua 1:8-9)
• His Heart-That he will love and trust You with his whole heart. (Deuteronomy 6:5, Proverbs 3:5)
• His Arms-That You will be his strength. (Psalm 73:26)
• His Hands-That he will enjoy the work of his hands and see it as a gift from You. (Ecclesiastes 3:13, 5:19)
• His feet – That You will order his steps and that he will walk in Your truth. (Proverbs 4:25, Psalm 26:3)

I have been feeling drawn to God in prayer for my husband. I have felt the need to lift him up in prayer and ask that he be blessed, guided and directed on the right path for our family. I've only just begun to pray daily in this manner and I already have a sense of peace, accomplishment, glorifying God and can feel the acceptance and comfort from resting in His arms.

I urge my lady friends to give this a try if they haven't already. It's brought me closer to the Lord, closer to my husband, and the sense of peace I get from it is truly indescribable. 

Sign Sign everywhere a sign...

Yesterday I took Frick and Frack to the Toledo Museum of Art. Going down Monroe street I was caught by a light. While sitting there Wyatt looks out his window and spots a gentlemen's club. He was so enamored by their sign on the building that it sparked an enthusiasm that I had to quickly extinguish. Here's our conversation:

Wyatt: Oh wow! Mom! Look! Lets go to that place! It looks neat!
Me: (looking at what he spotted) Oh, we don't want to go there, the art museum is a lot better
Wyatt: Are you sure? They have a better sign than the art museum
Me: Sometimes looks can be deceiving and trick you into liking things that you shouldn't
Wyatt: Can we just go there to try it?
Me: No
Wyatt: Why? Is it just for girls? There's a pretty girl on the sign
Me: Because I said so. It isn't for girls or boys, it's not a good place. It's a bad place
Wyatt: Why is it a bad place? It has a nice girl on it

**This has to be the longest light in city of Toledo, j/s**

Me: Because they don't teach you about God, and I don't want you to go somewhere that won't teach you about God.
Wyatt: But I don't want them to teach me about God, I want them to teach me about girls

**finally the light turns green, Thank you, Jesus!**

Me: All you need to know about girls is that God created them, we are not going there, the sign is tricking you to want to go there just because its pretty. You have to be careful, Satan tricks people like that.
Wyatt: That sneaky lil satan

Me: ***exhaustive sigh***

A year ago I would have been able to say that place was closed, or just a simple 'no' would do the trick. Now that he's learning to read, wanting to explore EVERYTHING, i'm finding i'm doing a lot more explaining. UGH! I've read a few articles this week about parents having to explain adult things to their children b/c society is exposing them to adult material.

Dish Network had an interruption of their Lilo & Stitch movie, it showed 6 minutes of porn and then flipped back to the movie. Could you imagine?!?! I wouldn't want to explain that to my children!! Also, in Toledo (I think) there was a business with a sign out front that said 'honk of you're horny' and parents had children asking what it meant.

I'll admit both of these had me laffing at first, but once I realized that the result was parents seeing their four and five year olds acting out what the saw during the Lilo & Stitch movie, and parents trying to avoid explaining adult material, I kinda felt bad that many adults don't have respect for the kids in our community. Children have a special innocence about them, and because of the selfishness of irresponsible individuals, they are stealing bits and pieces of these children's good childhood nature.

I used to think people who had dvd players in their vehicles where spoiled, showing off that they can spend their money wastefully, but now i'm thinking that idea is truly amazing! It'll keep their children's eyes where they belong, in a kid friendly zone.

I'm curious what others have done to distract their lil Einsteins when they see inappropriate material. Any suggestions? 

I

not sitting, not yet standing...more of a kneeling position...

Since my last little rant about wanting to make more of an effort to become a bigger part of the church I attend, there has been a few changes. I'm going to post them on here just so I can keep track with how i'm progressing, as I woke up this morning feeling as though I've hit a plateau.

I started to help with some programs that some of the church members have created. Here's the details:

For our VBS: I will be the teacher for the older kids. I'm super psyched about this. I've read through the material and I'm learning so much I can hardly wait to share it with the kids. I'm also donating some glow sticks which we'll pass out for July 4th weekend promoting our VBS week.

The ABC Infant Pantry is a monthly program that allows families in need of diapers, wipes or formula to stop by and pick some up. I've signed up to be in charge of getting the word out. Yeah, lets just say i'm improving, I wasn't off to a great start. It's getting better though! This month we helped 8 families! YAY! I'll be the first to admit I was a skeptic about this program working, but seeing it in action, I have let go of all my doubts. I'd like to add something to this program, and i'm sure the people who are in charge of it would welcome any ideas, I just can't pick out exactly what it is that I want to add. Hmm....

Something small, well...maybe small isn't the right word. But something that involves less **HEY EVERYONE LOOK AT ME I'M DOING SOMETHING FOR THE CHURCH** that i've been doing is praying. God has been guiding me to be active in my prayers. I found a pile of index cards with info of people to pray for who are starting churches in areas where it's not very common. I have been praying over these folks. Isn't it funny how the small things that no one really knows about can bring the biggest sense of peace and happiness? I feel great after devoting so much time to pray over them. I found a great app on my phone called Prayer Popper. You put in who you are praying for, and the details. Every few hours it sends your phone a reminder that its time to pray. I feel bad that I need that reminder, but i'm still new at this, and the reminder not only reminds me to pray for others, it keeps track of who I am praying for. Its much better than a scrap paper in my back pocket.

There are a few events coming up at church that I might help out with as well. I just haven't committed myself to them.

I was expecting a different feeling helping out with these programs. I was expecting to feel "complete" in a way. I was expecting it to be like a check list. Okay, I helped out, that was nice. But that's not how it happened.

The first program I offered to help with was the infant pantry. I chose to play an active role in this because I doubted it so much. I love challenges. I love when i'm proven wrong and God's Glory shines through. I considered it one giant butt-kick on Satan. Now that I see all the positives that God is doing for this ministry, instead of that "complete" feeling, instead of checking it off my list of things I participated in, I'm feeling this overwhelming urge to keep going. I'm not sure what i'm supposed to do, but God will tell me when the time is right.

Next, I offered to bring in some glow sticks. Nothing major, right? Right! But, my son had a glow in the dark birthday party and had many glow sticks. I had him keep some out to donate to the church. I explained that we were going to pass them out to kids in the neighborhood and invite them to VBS. Spending a few bucks at the dollar store is MINOR, teaching my son about giving and the importance of sharing Gods Word is MAJOR!

When the VBS program was in a pinch, I was asked to lead the older kids group. I wasn't asked till less than a month before the program. I have a lot of catching up to do as far as learning the material, gathering supplies, memorizing the schedule, etc. I know that I can do it though, i'm practically done with the planning and worse comes to worse, i'll post the schedule on my forehead. Because I wasn't a first choice for this position, and God knows my goal is to give him the glory no matter what that means, I know He will be with me every evening as I speak with those children and teach them about Jesus.

Gospel Mob

I'm easily entertained, especially when it comes to flash mobs. I'm not the type to join one, but I like knowing what they're doing, then being there to see it all come together. Someone had a great idea to take this to the next level, and they created cash mobs.

In our area, the members of the cash mob, choose a local business (once a month), spread the word on the day of the mob and they all go there to purchase their items. It might be a local sandwich shop or maybe even just a fruit stand, either way its a great way to get the community together to support small business owners in their area.

That got me thinking....what we need is a gospel mob. Wouldn't it be great?! Let's just take a moment to picture it.....

The mob would invite their friends and family to come together at a particular church, (First Baptist Church of Oregon, for example) to share the gospel, meet other Christians, network and stand as a unified group. Not everyone has a church home, perhaps someone gets invited to the mob, they may choose to belong to this particular church. If someone is invited who has not yet met Jesus, and does not know of God's unconditional love, we could be just what they needed, to be encouraged to enter a church. (attending church can be intimidating when doing it alone)

What a wonderful gift to God it would be to share the gospel with those who stand in the shadow of the church

Oh well....a girl can dream, right?

My seat at church is warm, cozy, and has a great view

I never thought that would be a problem! I was reading this morning and the Lord found a way to speak to me in a way that I will listen. He speaks to me often, I'm just not the best at listening. This time, He reached out through  words and i'm feeling guilty. Guilty enough to blog no less!

The church I attend is going through many changes. The changes that are taking place are not just changes with programming, or decorations, I now see the changes that are being made by the people who attend the church. They are changing, becoming more Jesus centered.

One of the first things I noticed about the change, is the building itself is a little different. The decorations are different, things are in different places. It's a small change, but for a church that has always looked the same, those small differences are noticed immediately. It might be the small bulletin board decoration, a new toy in the nursery, or the rooms are switched. Whatever those small changes are, they are just a peek into the bigger changes that are going on.

The next thing I noticed was the change in programs. Once again, small changes, but good changes. Children's church in the morning, men's bible study, infant pantry.

As I sit in my pew, my comfy, warm, cozy pew, I see all these changes. Where am I in these changes?

The church I attend is changing, i'm just sitting back watching it all happen. Kind of like in Autumn, watching the leaves change color day by day.

As relaxing as that sounds, sitting back observing, it's not where I want to be, its not what I want to be doing. It's quite obvious that I need changed too! I've been sitting so still in my pew, I wonder if i've just become one of the decorations lol

I'd love to see these new programs grow our church, not just in numbers, but really see myself and those around me grow as Christians. I will not grow as a Christian if i'm not fully supporting these programs. If i'm just sitting, waiting for change, and not being the change, then the church isn't changing. We can add 12 new programs, offer amazing praise services, we could have so many people attend our church that we'd only have standing room only, but, if we're not fully committed to fulfilling God's goals for ourselves and others, then it doesn't matter how good our church looks from the outside, we'd still be apart from God. So, while it's easy, and comfortable to sit in my pew, watching others work hard to grow our church into a powerful God fearing group, it's not what God has intended for me.

My church needs me to be a Christian, to give my all to Him, allow Jesus to work through me, continue to grow by obeying Him, if everyone lived everyday for Jesus, every moment, every minute, every second, imagine the power churches would have!

It's not enough to have programs, special speakers, and many attendee's, if you don't have people dedicated to the Lord, are you really doing the best for your church?

When God makes changes in our lives, not everyone stays around to be part of the new us He is molding us to be. Sometimes we feel completely broken, to our lowest, but we must remember that to become who He wants us to be, may mean that we go through some rough times.

The church (as a whole) goes through the same change a person does as it grows to become more like Jesus. Everyone at your church (whether they want to be part of the change or not) is influencing how Christ-like they become. Every church member is responsible for their role in moving their church forward. I am simply a seat warmer. I'm part of the change and didn't realize the effect I am having on my church. The changes going on around me are for His glory. By not taking part in these changes, I am choosing to be a weak link for my church family. If you think of a tree, I'm one of those branches that hang low and bang against the window that eventually gets cut off b/c it's not bearing any fruit. It's just a nuisance.

I need to bring some vitality back. I don't want to be the seat warmer, I don't want to watch everyone try to fulfill God's purpose while I remain an observer. I want to be part of the action.

So, I'm gonna do the work I need to do, to move my church forward. To make sure I am doing everything for God. I want to be more like Jesus, and I want everyone to see Jesus working through me for His glory. I'm ready to give up my comfy cozy seat in the pew, and get up and take action!

I'm not sure where to go from here, but I'll begin with prayer, and wait for His answer.

Laundry day!

Wyatt has been potty trained for awhile now, but I'm noticing he will still wet the bed if he's distracted. Which is kind of annoying. An idea that was given to me, was when this happens, make Wyatt wash his own bedding. I'm giving it a try and I'll keep you updated on how it works.

                                                        This is after he stripped the bed

                                                          The long haul down the stairs

                                                Bundling them up for the trip to the basement

                                                           And finally, into the washer!

SkOoL'd by my 3 year old

This morning we were driving to my in-laws house, they watched Wyatt while Laci went to a Dr. appt. On the way there I was listening to Yes FM and there was a Christian rap song on. When it was over, I turned the station. Wyatt asked me if this song was about Jesus too. I replied, no. He asked if she was singing about God. I replied, no. Then he asked "Then why are you listening to it?"

I often tell myself that i'm not surrounding myself with enough positive influence. I know one of the things I need to change is the music I listen to. Which by the way, the song that was on, was not a bad song, just wasn't praising God. But he has a point, why am I choosing to listen to it, when I was listening to Yes FM a few minutes before. Why did I change it?

I didn't have an answer. But now I feel convicted about the music I'm listening to. Why would I throw away an opportunity to listen to music that praises the Prince of Peace? Lord of Lords? My Savior? Why would I pass that up just to listen to a song that didn't hold any value to me.

Thanks for opening my eyes, Wyatt. I love you!

Just so you know, it really wasn't a BAD song, its just the point of why did I pass up one for the other? I'm still pondering on that one.

The song I was listening to was Breakaway by Kelly Clarkson

Grew up in a small town
And when the rain would fall down
I'd just stare out my window
Dreaming of what could be
And if I'd end up happy
I would pray (I would pray)

Trying hard to reach out
But when I tried to speak out
Felt like no one could hear me
Wanted to belong here
But something felt so wrong here
So I prayed I could break away

[Chorus:]
I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly
I'll do what it takes til' I touch the sky
And I'll make a wish
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway
Out of the darkness and into the sun
But I won't forget all the ones that I love
I'll take a risk
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway

Wanna feel the warm breeze
Sleep under a palm tree
Feel the rush of the ocean
Get onboard a fast train
Travel on a jet plane, far away (I will)
And breakaway

[Chorus]

Buildings with a hundred floors
Swinging around revolving doors
Maybe I don't know where they'll take me but
Gotta keep moving on, moving on
Fly away, breakaway

I'll spread my wings
And I'll learn how to fly
Though it's not easy to tell you goodbye
I gotta take a risk
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway
Out of the darkness and into the sun
But I won't forget the place I come from
I gotta take a risk
Take a chance
Make a change
And breakaway, breakaway, breakaway

                                                       Well, at least she mentions 'pray' ;)

where to go from here?

Being a stay at home mom, hasn't turned into what I thought it was going to. First of all, it took me six months to realize that I was a stay at home mom. I spent six months wondering and praying if being a stay at home mom was what God had intended for me at this moment. SIX MONTHS!!! Six months I wasted, those six months I cannot get back. I didn't do anything useful for His glory during those six months!! Well, its now been 9 months!! 9 months that I spend day in, and day out, trying to figure out what I'm supposed to be doing! This is driving me crazy! I spend time with the kids, I take them places, I teach them some basics, but at the end of the day, I still feel incomplete. I feel as though I'm missing the mark on this one. I feel as though there's SOMETHING that I'm supposed to be doing, that i'm just not figuring it out. I've been meaning to pray about it, but I'll be honest, my list of those who I need to pray for is so long, that by the time I get to me, (Jesus, Others, Yourself) I'm outta time, I'm either distracted by one of the children, or it may be time to make dinner, or I may just fall asleep due to exhaustion from the busy day. The only hope i'm holding on to, is that Jesus knows my heart, He knows what i'm going through, what i'm thinking, and the help I'm needing. I just need time to listen. As i'm sure many of you know, listening is NOT one of my best traits. I'm tired of wasting my time not knowing what i'm supposed to be doing. I used to think the saying was "don't just sit there, do something!" but now I've learned you shouldn't just do something, sit there, until God tells you what to do. U.G.H. times like these I wish He would communicate through a burning bush or something. :/